From a bolshy child with a Welsh-speaking budgie to National Treasure, Janet Street-Porter's life (and language) has always been colourful.

As a broadcaster, television executive, and newspaper editor, she was at the forefront of some of Britain's most enduring cultural moments. Now she finds herself on the cusp of turning 80 and so her agent has decided he needs to milk this cash-cow while he can.

Armed with a senior railcard and a fifth husband in tow, the nation's favourite pensioner is back on the road bringing comedy, tragedy, and gossip in equal measure, a tour de force rant against growing old gracefully.